My name is Shelly Thompson. I am Ryan’s mom, and I would like to share my son’s story of loss by suicide with the hope that it will encourage you to reach out for help if you are struggling with thoughts of suicide.
The world is missing a kind, humorous, and handsome young man due to an impulsive and final decision that cannot be reversed or fixed. This young man’s name is Ryan Lee Thompson. He left this earthly world at the early age of seventeen on December 30, 2012. Ryan is my son. My only child.
I share Ryan’s story to best of my ability with the information that was presented to us, his father and I, at the time of his passing.
The morning of December 29, 2012, which was a Saturday, it had snowed but was a beautiful day. The morning started with a family breakfast and since it was a long weekend before a holiday there was less hustle than usual. There were plans of attending a 50th birthday party beginning mid afternoon that of course a 17-year-old did not want to attend “an old people’s party”, so he decided to stay home and then meet with friends later. Due to the weather, we asked that he not drive until the roads cleared which he did not question since there was pizza, a favorite food, in the house for later. My husband and I left for the “old people’s party.”
Around 4:00 pm my husband spoke with Ryan via cell phone and his plans were to stay home, make the pizza, watch a movie, and work out which was typical Ry. Nothing unusual about his behavior. His plans for the day were his normal.
When my husband and I returned home that evening the dog was at the door, the basement door open, lights on and the stereo was playing. Given Ryan was a teenager all seemed to be normal. We yelled down the basement that we were home. We watched TV and went to bed.
I woke up at a not so normal time of the morning noticing the music was still playing. I walked down to the basement expecting to see him asleep on the couch. I was just going to turn off the music like mom’s do and either leave him be or wake him and ask him to go to bed. I did not, and I mean not in a million years, think that I would find my baby deceased and the cause of death be due to suicide.
I must say that morning will forever be etched into my heart and soul. Ryan’s father at this point having heard me scream came running to realizes our handsome, one-of-a-kind, son had passed away.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the loss of a loved one to suicide and the everlasting hurt that lingers long after their last breath and this was our child.
The emergency personnel, police officers and the coroner are the next groups of people that we were exposed to and then next was contacting family with news that rips you to the core.
From what we understand, after a formal investigation was completed, is there was a young lady who began to harass Ryan a few months prior and up to the day of his death via cell phone calls, texts, face to face, and even having others harass him constantly at school and in public. The topic of the harassment was that the young lady was claiming to be pregnant and insisting Ryan was the father. Ryan was receiving threats and photos of what he thought was her pregnant stomach growing through a normal pregnancy. Although Ryan was deleting these items from his phone, he had sent them to friends which meant there was evidence of the harassment he never shared with us. Never did the friends think the resolution to the situation would have been suicide.
As Ryan’s story unfolds my husband and I are left heartbroken, empty, unable to breath, and planning a funeral rather than planning for his senior year of high school and prepping for what we all hoped would be a bright future not just for himself but simply as our son. Don’t all parents expect to outlive their children?
As the investigation continues and everyday life goes on for everyone except Ryan and his family, the investigators inform us they must speak with the other parties involved because there may be a grandchild. They confront the young lady, accompanied by her parents. All parties initially deny the harassment and the topic of the harassment until the investigators eventually shared the actual text messages, photos and voice mails which revealed otherwise. It was not until then a final admission of harassment and a confirmation the pregnancy was a lie. The pictures were from the internet. She was never pregnant. Our son completed suicide due to a fabricated story.
Ryan’s death could have been prevented if only he reached out for help when he must have been feeling so low not to believe his life mattered. This young man mattered to us more then we value ourselves.
This is Ryan’s forever story. The ending will never change.
My husband and I will forever be survivors of a loss of a loved one by suicide which is eternally heartbreaking and carries its own lifelong stigma. We will continue to keep his footprints fresh so that he may not be forgotten. Ryan existed and he mattered then as much as he does to this day.
We intend to continue to share Ryan’s story to encourage you to reach out for help regardless of the situation so your life and your story will continue. Please reach out for help because as you just read a conversation may have resolved what may have seemed to Ryan as a difficult situation to overcome rather than resulting in a loss of his life to suicide due to unkind individuals and a fabricated story.
Together let us break down the stigma of suicide. Asking for help from others is ok. Talk it out. Give life another day and let your story continue.
If you are a survivor of a loved one lost to suicide, please know you are not alone. I encourage you too to seek out support. You will be accepted. You may say their name and share your unique grief with those that understand your new normal.
If you are concerned about a loved one or a friend, be the one to ask those tough questions. You may be the light someone needs to stay.
Shelly (Ryan’s Mom)
